Memorial Day. The holiday that should get the most respect and recognition amongst all holidays.
This is my opinion.
I try and compare to other festive events we take the time out to celebrate. Think about it. We normally acknowledge the birth of Jesus with unnecessary gifts, LED strands of lights engulfing our homes and driving our utility bill costs through the roof. We then install a tree in our living room that we feed a gallon of sprite per day because Martha Stewart said it was a healthy diet for the tree. This is all after we removed every god damn form of plant life from our own property so we could install a Bocce Ball court and a tennis stadium in our backyard. Then Jesus happens to come back to life. This is a pretty serious ordeal so we dye rotten boiled eggs and shower our children with “diabetes in a basket” to honor this epic religious accomplishment. We then proceed to assassinate 300 million innocent turkeys that, when cooked, are as moist as a “Microwaved Indian Termite Farm.” Let us not forget the Jewish holidays where we spin a poorly engineered device made out of clay and fry 72 pounds of potatoes that has every Jewish woman crapping in their pants because they haven’t turned on the stove or opened the spice rack in 11 and a half months after their husbands dropped $85,000 on a major kitchen renovation.
The celebrations are cute and it’s nice that we all participate in our respected holidays but in the end none of this is possible without the heroes we honor this weekend. These heroes should not only be honored this weekend, they should be honored each day we all wake up, breathe our air full of freedom and begin our day.
This day must remind us all of the importance of the men and women that I believe are truly born to protect us. It takes a certain person to do what they do. They are better than me. They died fighting for you and I. They died for the houses we live in. The cars we drive. The underwear we put on. The vacations we cherish. Every beat of our hearts and each breath we take. Respect it!
These fearless soldiers showed up to the German beaches facing an almost certain death to fight and protect our freedom. The same freedom that enables short fuchsia colored Italian men with a disheveled nut hanging out the left side of their “Mike The Situation” speedo to show up to the beaches of New Jersey with a sausage link pierced nipple and “death before dishonor” tattoos embroidered across their sunburned Adam’s apple as they sip on an ice cold Zima. The only honor these chooches have is the ability to purchase a teal green Iroc-Z with rusted t-tops and a brass Italian horn dangling from the rearview mirror. Remember, that “Vanilla Roma” air freshener only makes your nasty ass Mustang 5.0 smell better because of the heroes protecting your black Reebok, metallic blue Sergio Tacchini wearing sorry ass.
Our right to show up at a restaurant and complain about our cup of coffee and our overcooked steak is because of them. In other countries you would lose your head in front of Dennys on National pancake day for this behavior. The right to go and buy a set of bigger boobies, publicly protest our beliefs, fulfill our lifelong dreams of becoming whatever we want to be. Choice is ours because of them. Let us never forget that.
Our daily lives here in America each and everyday should never be taken for granted. Do we all know just how lucky we are to live in the greatest, strongest, most powerful and opportunistic country in the world? Some will disagree. That’s their right. Remember, those who sacrificed everything gave you that right to leave if you are unhappy. So exercise that right and stop spreading your negativity on social media and go live in Africa. When your legs are dangling out of the mouth of a “Hungry Hippo” let me know what you think of America! Move to Canada. Hopefully you are a good hockey player. They all seem to complain but they never leave. Hmmmm!
Our Country is not perfect. There is room and much need for change and improvement. That takes unity and great effort from all of us as a nation. Some will disagree with leadership. That’s ok. That’s your right but the sense of division and direction we are heading in is a spit in the face to the very individuals who died for us so we can prosper in our way of life.
I love my Country. I bow down and thank you all that have sacrificed everything to even allow me to express my thoughts and appreciation to the heroes, the bravery, the chosen ones and all their families. Thank you. Thank you.
Happy Memorial Day! God Bless!